Tag Archives: travel

Can the World Not Behave Itself for Five Minutes? Texts You Don’t Want to Get While On Vacation

Why is it when you try to embrace the empty nest, the helicopters appear instead?  Why is it, indeed, any time you try and take a vacash–the world erupts? You and your husband were just in Paris in order to … Continue reading

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Don’t. Speed. Through. South. Carolina. (tales from a former faux southern hippie)

Flashback, Summer 1972.  You and your cousin, age seventeen, are wearing tube tops, bell bottoms and flip-flops, with hair two feet straight down the back and parted in the middle and immense chandelier earrings you’d bought at the Gay Dolphin … Continue reading

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Blaming Mom

You spent most of the weekend trying to herd your children away from Lee.  Last week, your daughter called from further north to give you a heads-up that although a big, fat depression would be sitting on top of the … Continue reading

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Huck Goes to Henley: No Hat, No Service

In honor of the Henley Royal Regatta which follows Wimbledon: When you and Sumner moved to London in 1974, you found a lovely flat in Chelsea, off of the Kings Road.  Your landlord, George, took you under his wing like … Continue reading

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Cherry Grove Beach, 1964

Beach, 1964: We’d take two cars for your family of seven.  The Plymouth station wagon would be loaded to the gills with: 1. Stacks of worn leather- bound suitcases with brass hardware 2. Metal ice chests and a sporty plaid … Continue reading

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Empty Nesters Gone Wild

Why look like this, when you could look like this: It’s time to change the term “Empty Nester.”  For some reason, this label has always conjured up visions of Mr. Rogers in his old faded cardigan, wandering aimlessly around the … Continue reading

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Girl Trips: What do Women Talk About?

Ah, the eternal question:  WHAT on earth do women talk about while they are on these ‘girl getaways?’ Men, listen up; here’s EXACTLY what is discussed, in alpha order: Books.  Who is reading what.  And why, for example, did “The … Continue reading

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Spring Break Hath Stood You Up

Your spring break done came and went.  Your break, BROKE.  It  ‘up and left town.’  Fled.  Hasta la vista.  Adiosed, 86’ed, kaput, vamoosed.  Vanished off the face of the earth.  It is to be…no more.  Spring Break?  Hah! Even though … Continue reading

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Honey, you gave birth LONG before Verizon did

Labor Day, 1990. You are driving back from visiting your parents, who live two states away.  Your four-year-old daughter is strapped into her car seat in the back, and you are both singing along merrily to Raffi, or some such, … Continue reading

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You Are So, NOT, Rick Steves

Last weekend, your neighbor Elizabeth took 24 pieces of luggage to a resort.  “Out of Africa” is her favorite film, and she travels as if going on an expedition with the Queen.  Of course this includes all manner of suitcases and … Continue reading

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